The-Chronic

RANDBURG, FRIDAY. 3 Writers from a local so-so-satirical paper The-Chronic were taken into custody by police following a 48 second car chase, which left 3 people dazed and 4 pedestrains mildly ambivalent. The writers were being sought by police for a myriad of offenses ranging from splitting infinitives to dangling their participles. Police say they are grateful and shed tears of elation when the 3, known only as 'the 3' were put behind the wooden doors of Doornkop prison. The 3 escaped immediately but were found smoking in the ladies room of a nearby club, The Articulate Nonce, where they had been hitting on one of the employees, a 22 year old semi-clad... continued page 9

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